2009年7月22日 星期三

Michelangelo Antonioni. L'Eclisse





Eclisse 的英文,是 Eclipse。

eclipse
n. 日蝕, 月蝕, 衰落

故事,或者說畫面,是以一個女人為主要拍攝對象,呈現出她的兩段感情生活,以及這段期間內她所見證到的一些現象,譬如格鬥場般的、電子時代以前的證券交易所;1960年代,羅馬中產階級以上的生活景觀。

然而,基本上,我看得一頭霧水。無法明確地看出導演想陳述的是那個女人的感情生活,或是一種時代氛圍。黑白畫面的構圖、色調都很漂亮,有一種極簡的優雅,那女人的行為始終像是個謎,始終充滿了未說出口的許多話,始終活在一種壓抑中,不管是否強顏歡笑。畫面中最搶眼的,除了女人的表情、動作,就是她的衣服,幾乎每換一個場景就是一套新的衣服,好像是義大利 vogue 的情境影片一樣。一開始有個鏡頭還特別點出了她的腳,以及腳上的高跟鞋,非常好看的比例,強度可比王家衛在2046裡拍王菲的那段,只是沒有那麼刻意。

有些元素是導演在別的電影中也用過的,飛機、馬、敞篷跑車,讓人想到未來主義所歌頌的事物。還有些東西,也不曉得為何出現,像是機場的美式 jazz pub、那個肯亞歸國的女人以及當天晚上的玩樂與裝扮成非洲人到後來跑出去找狗的整段、以及最後那班帶著上班的人回到男女主角的老地方的公車...

是看到了一些很真切的東西,畫面也很詩意,但就是不曉得要用什麼脈絡去串起來,夢一樣。

2009年7月21日 星期二

20世紀中文小說100強



一百強名單

1. 《吶喊》,魯迅  
2. 《邊城》,沈從文  
3. 《駱駝祥子》,老舍  
4. 《傳奇》,張愛玲  
5. 《圍城》,錢鍾書  
6. 《子夜》,茅盾  
7. 《台北人》,白先勇  
8. 《家》,巴金  
9. 《呼蘭河傳》,蕭紅  
10. 《老殘遊記》,劉鶚  
11. 《寒夜》,巴金  
12. 《彷徨》,魯迅  
13. 《官場現形記》,李伯元  
14. 《財主底兒女們》,路翎  
15. 《將軍族》,陳映真  
16. 《沉淪》,郁達夫  
17. 《死水微瀾》,李劼人  
18. 《紅高粱》,莫言  
19. 《小二黑結婚》,趙樹理  
20. 《棋王》,鍾阿城  
21. 《家變》,王文興  
22. 《馬橋詞典》,韓少功  
23. 《亞細亞的孤兒》,吳濁流  
24. 《半生緣》,張愛玲  
25. 《四世同堂》,老舍  
26. 《胡雪巖》,高陽  
27. 《啼笑因緣》,張恨水  
28. 《兒子的大玩偶》,黃春明  
29. 《射鵰英雄傳》,金庸  
30. 《莎菲女士的日記》,丁玲  
31. 《鹿鼎記》,金庸  
32. 《孽海花》,曾樸  
33. 《惹事》,賴和  
34. 《嫁妝一牛車》,王禎和  
35. 《異域》,柏楊  
36. 《曾國藩》,唐浩明  
37. 《原鄉人》,鍾理和  
38. 《白鹿原》,陳忠實
39. 《長恨歌》,王安憶  
40. 《吉陵春秋》,李永平  
41. 《黃禍》,王力雄  
42. 《狂風沙》,司馬中原  
43. 《艷陽天》,浩然  
44. 《公墓》,穆時英  
45. 《舊址》,李銳  
46. 《星星·月亮·太陽》,徐速  
47. 《台灣人三部曲》,鍾肇政  
48. 《洗澡》,楊絳  
49. 《旋風》,姜貴  
50. 《荷花澱》,孫犁
51. 《我城》,西西
52. 《受戒》,汪曾祺
53. 《鐵漿》,朱西甯
54. 《世紀末的華麗》,朱天文
55. 《蜀山劍俠傳》,還珠樓主
56. 《又見棕櫚,又見棕櫚》,於梨華
57. 《浮躁》,賈平凹
58. 《組織部新來的年輕人》,王蒙
59. 《玉梨魂》,徐枕亞
60. 《香港三部曲》,施叔青
61. 《京華煙雲》,林語堂
62. 《倪煥之》,葉聖陶
63. 《春桃》,許地山
64. 《桑青與桃紅》,聶華苓
65. 《藍與黑》,王藍
66. 《二月》,柔石
67. 《風蕭蕭》,徐訏
68. 《芙蓉鎮》,古華
69. 《地之子》,臺靜農
70. 《城南舊事》,林海音
71. 《古船》,張煒
72. 《酒徒》,劉以鬯
73. 《未央歌》,鹿橋
74. 《沉重的翅膀》,張潔
75. 《果園城記》,師陀
76. 《人啊,人!》,戴厚英
77. 《黃金時代》,王小波
78. 《狗日的糧食》,劉恆
79. 《棋王》,張系國
80. 《賴索》,黃凡
81. 《妻妾成群》,蘇童
82. 《霸王別姬》,李碧華
83. 《殺夫》,李昂
84. 《楚留香》,古龍
85. 《窗外》,瓊瑤
86. 《沉默之島》,蘇偉貞
87. 《白髮魔女傳》,梁羽生
88. 《古都》,朱天心
89. 《尹縣長》,陳若曦
90. 《四喜憂國》,張大春
91. 《喜寶》,亦舒
92. 《男人的一半是女人》,張賢亮
93. 《將軍底頭》,施蟄存
94. 《藍血人》,倪匡
95. 《二十年目睹之怪現狀》,吳趼人
96. 《活著》,余華
97. 《岡底斯的誘惑》,馬原
98. 《十年十意》,林斤瀾
99. 《北極風情畫》,無名氏 
100. 《雍正皇帝》,二月河


2009年7月20日 星期一

idea. 無政府主義的想像



1.
所有的革命都來自於對目前體制的不滿,若要興起下一波革命,則似乎會是來自對於目前顢頇的民主制度的不滿。

2.
愛因斯坦說過「專家不過是會投票的驢子」,如果人民僅能靠投票來選擇,那麼當被提出來的選擇都不好時,該怎麼辦?(譬如選某一任總統的時候)僅能選比較不爛的?這樣就好像是奪魂鋸裡會出現的抉擇時刻,是要選擇腳被砍掉還是手被砍掉?為什麼要在那樣的情境做選擇?

3.
以考試的情況來思考,選擇題往往也都是過份化約的結果,申論題才能看得出一個答題者的程度,很多問題不是單純的是非題,而是就算選擇「是」,還要怎麼去處理相關的配套措施。(像是台灣是否該簽署ECFA),泛政治化地以二分法來思考,並沒有辦法處理實務上的千變萬化。

4.
「政府」這樣的東西,到底有多少可信賴的部份?當一個體制無競爭者時,走向墮落是不難預期的,而公務人員體系就是如此。任何企業就算有托拉斯傾向,通常也不敢掉以輕心,昔日的巨人不代表能永遠屹立不搖(譬如GM、Microsoft、雷曼兄弟)。目前的公務人員體系就像是寄生於全體人民身上的必要之惡,是否有辦法加以監督、提高其績效、以企業的原則加以管理?「防止全民個資外洩」或許是這類單位存在的一大原因。

5.
在中古歐洲的城邦時代,或是中國藩鎮割據的時代,是否也算是一種無政府主義?戰國時代各地蓬勃發展自己的東西,直到秦始皇才統一天下的文字、制度。然而春秋戰國卻也是中國文化史上少數諸子百家爭鳴的盛世。

6.
「想窩在某個大有為的體制的保護下」或許是小老百姓對於政府、君王的期望,但歷史的明證顯示,真的有這種運氣的老百姓不多,某個君主或是總統固然對大局有關鍵性的影響,但從頭到尾始終存在的參數則是「官僚」,也就是公務人員體系,如果不能有效地對付這個體系,任何革命都難以帶來真正的變化。

7.
在動物的世界,政府是不存在的,一切都是叢林法則,弱肉強食、物競天擇、適者生存,現在每次看 discovery 的動物節目都會獲得一些啟發,本來就從來沒有人能保證什麼,官員會貪腐,警察會和黑道掛勾,公司高層會掏空,小販會黑心,人原本在受教育的過程中所灌輸的單純美好,其實並不總是存在於現世。而我認為無政府主義就是要來點破這樣的狀況,人活在某些被曖昧的說詞所架構出來的「文明體制」中過了數千年,但基本上我們的處境還是和野生動物一樣艱困而充滿挑戰,曖昧的說詞僅像是麻醉劑,讓人好像可以信賴著某些美好的理想,然後咒罵著歷史上不斷玷污著這些理想的奸人。以科學的觀點來看,當一個假說總是出現例外時,表示理論有漏洞,以研究者的角度,應該是去找出漏洞的原因,並修正原本的理論,直到漏洞不再出現,而不是咒罵例外的發生。

8.
某種程度上的共同機制或許仍是必須存在的,譬如文字、科技規格、運輸系統、貨幣,至少要能有效綠地彼此溝通。但「無政府」的限度要放寬到哪種程度?

9.
前蘇聯與中共的馬克思集權主義也絕非取代資本主義的好方法,後者在近十年反而滲入了前者。馬克思是批判資本主義的好工具,但不是答案。若是放手給商業財閥彼此競爭,世界是否會更好一點?

10.
無政府主義要成功的要件,在於人民的素質,如果人民還是很容易被粗糙的說詞煽動,或者不願意面對世界複雜的真實面,僅追求某些單純美好的當下的滿足,那麼,巧言令色的騙子們就始終有著力點。這回歸到 ghost in the shell tv.2 的感覺,自覺的個體不夠多的時候,世界是很難有什麼改變的。如果要改變些什麼,應該是靠教育吧,並非精英主義式的灌輸自我的觀念,而是提出更多元的觀點給大眾,或許像是歐洲的啟蒙運動那樣。


2009年7月16日 星期四

poem. Pablo Neruda - Twenty Love Poems and a Song of Despair / 聶魯達 - 二十首情詩和一支絕望的歌



1. "Body of a Woman"

Body of a woman, white hills, white thighs,
you look like a world, lying in surrender.
My rough peasant's body digs in you
and makes the son leap from the depth of the earth.

I was lone like a tunnel. The birds fled from me,
and night swamped me with its crushing invasion.
To survive myself I forged you like a weapon,
like an arrow in my bow, a stone in my sling.

But the hour of vengeance falls, and I love you.
Body of skin, of moss, of eager and firm milk.
Oh the goblets of the breast! Oh the eyes of absence!
Oh the roses of the pubis! Oh your voice, slow and sad!

Body of my woman, I will persist in your grace.
My thirst, my boundless desire, my shifting road!
Dark river-beds where the eternal thirst flows
and weariness follows, and the infinite ache.

女人的身體、潔白的山丘、潔白的大腿,
你看起來彷彿一個世界,順服地躺臥著。
我農夫般粗野的身體挖掘著你
並使得嬰孩從大地的深處躍出。

我有如隧道般孤獨,鳥群逃離我
且排山倒海襲來的黑夜將我吞沒。
為了生存,我將你鍛造得像是一件武器,
彷彿我弓上的箭,投擲器上的石塊。

但復仇的時刻降臨,且我愛你。
有著肌膚、苔蘚、熱切而固態的乳汁的身體。
噢,乳房的酒杯!噢,迷離的眼眸!
噢,恥骨的玫瑰!噢,你的聲音,緩慢而傷悲!

我的女人的身體,我將執著於你的魅力。
我的渴望,我無限的情慾,我不斷變化的道路!
暗黑的河床上流動著永恆的渴望
與隨之而來的疲憊,以及無盡的疼痛。


2. "The Light Wraps You"

The light wraps you in its mortal flame.
Abstracted pale mourner, standing that way
against the old propellers of the twilight
that revolves around you.

Speechless, my friend,
alone in the loneliness of this hour of the dead
and filled with the lives of fire,
pure heir of the ruined day.

A bough of fruit falls from the sun on your dark garment.
The great roots of night grow suddenly from your soul,
and the things that hide in you come out again
so that a blue and pallid people,
your newly born, takes nourishment.

Oh magnificent and fecund and magnetic slave
of the circle that moves in turn through black and gold:
rise, lead and possess a creation
so rich in life that its flowers perish
and it is full of sadness.

這光線將你包覆在它終將消逝的火焰中,
心不在焉而蒼白的送葬者,以那種方式
對抗著盤旋於你周圍的
暮色老舊的螺旋槳。

無言,我的朋友,
獨處於這死亡時刻的寂寞中
且充滿著火的生命力,
這毀滅之日純正的繼承人。

滿枝的水果從太陽落到你深色的衣裳上。
黑夜粗大的根忽然從你的靈魂長出,
而隱藏於你心中的事再次出現
使得一個藍色而蒼白的種族,
你的新生兒,獲得滋養。

噢這個依序由黑色移動到金色的循環的
美妙、豐饒、且有吸引力的奴隸:
升起,引領且掌握著一個宇宙
如此地有活力而它的花朵枯萎
且充滿傷悲。


3. "Ah Vastness of Pines"

Ah vastness of pines, murmur of waves breaking,
slow play of lights, solitary bell,
twilight falling in your eyes, toy doll,
earth-shell, in whom the earth sings!

In you the rivers sing and my soul flees in them
as you desire, and you send it where you will.
Aim my road on your bow of hope
and in a frenzy I will free my flock of arrows.

On all sides I see your waist of fog,
and your silence hunts down my afflicted hours;
my kisses anchor, and my moist desire nests
in you with your arms of transparent stone.

Ah your mysterious voice that love tolls and darkens
in the resonant and dying evening!
Thus in deep hours I have seen, over the fields,
the ears of wheat tolling in the mouth of the wind.

啊,遼闊的松林,打斷了浪濤的呢喃,
緩慢閃爍的光線,孤獨的鐘聲,
暮色落入你的雙眼,玩具娃娃,
埋入土中的貝殼,大地在裡頭歌唱!

河流在你體內唱著歌而我的靈魂消逝於其中
如你所願,且隨你將它送往何處。
在你的希望之弓上瞄準我的道路
且在一陣狂亂下我將釋放我的箭束。

在各處我都看到你霧似的纖腰,
而你的沉默追捕著我飽受折磨的時光;
我的吻停泊著,而我溼潤的欲望築起了巢
在你與你如透明墓石般的臂彎裡。

啊,你神秘的嗓音喜愛喪鐘且
在這迴音與垂死的夜裡變得更黑暗!
因此在深夜我曾看見,田野上,
麥穗在風的口中鳴著鐘。


4. "The Morning is Full"

The morning is full of storm
in the heart of summer.

The clouds travel like white handkerchiefs of goodbye,
the wind, travelling, waving them in its hands.

The numberless heart of the wind
beating above our loving silence.

Orchestral and divine, resounding among the trees
like a language full of wars and songs.

Wind that bears off the dead leaves with a quick raid
and deflects the pulsing arrows of the birds.

Wind that topples her ni a wave without spray
and substance without weight, and leaning fires.

Her mass of kisses breaks and sinks,
assailed in the door of the summer's wind.

風暴席捲著清晨
在夏季的心中。
白雲在漫遊,宛似一塊塊告別的白手帕
風用飄擺的雙手將它們晃動。

暴風無限的心靈
跳動在我們相愛的寂靜中。
在林間呼呼作響,神聖而又動聽,
宛似一種語言,充滿了戰鬥與歌聲。

暴風飛快地掠走枯枝敗葉
並擾亂了鳥兒跳動之箭的飛行。
風將她推倒,在沒有浪花的波濤、
沒有重量的物質和傾斜的火中。

她的親吻在爆裂並沉默
在夏日之風的門口拼搏。


5. "So That You Will Hear Me"

So that you will hear me
my words
sometimes grow thin
as the tracks of the gulls on the beaches.

Necklace, drunken bell
for your hands smooth as grapes.

And I watch my words from a long way off.
They are more yours than mine.
They climb on my old suffering like ivy.

It climbs the same way on damp walls.
You are to blame for this cruel sport.
They are fleeing from my dark lair.
You fill everything, you fill everything.

Before you they peopled the solitude that you occupy,
and they are more used to my sadness than you are.

Now I want them to say what I want to say to you
to make you hear as I want you to hear me.

The wind of anguish still hauls on them as usual.
Sometimes hurricanes of dreams still knock them over.
You listen to other voices in my painful voice.

Lament of old mouths, blood of old supplications.
Love me, companion. Don't forsake me. Follow me.
Follow me, companion, on this wave of anguish.

But my words become stained with your love.
You occupy everything, you occupy everything.

I am making them into an endless necklace
for your white hands, smooth as grapes.

為了讓你
聽得見我的話語
它們有時細得
像海鷗在沙灘上的足跡。
項鍊,陶醉的鈴鐺
獻到你像葡萄般柔軟的手上。

我望著自己在遠方的話語。
它們其實更屬於你。
它們像常春藤一樣爬上我痛苦的往昔。
它們這樣攀上潮濕的牆壁。
這淌血的遊戲,是由你引起。

它們正在逃離我陰暗的巢穴。
你無所不在,充滿一切。
它們先於你,佔據了你的孤獨,
它們比你更習慣於我的愁苦。
此刻我向它們道出對你的訴說
為了讓你聽到它們如同想讓你聽到我。
苦悶的風常常將它們拖跑。
夢幻的狂飆往往將它們橫掃。
在我痛苦的聲音中你會聽到別的聲音。
古老的口中的哭泣,古老的乞求的血滴。
伴侶啊,愛我吧。跟著我,別將我拋棄。
伴侶啊,跟著我,在這苦惱的波濤裡。

我的話語會染上你的愛的色彩。
你佔據了一切,你無所不在。
我要用所有的話語做成一條長長的項鍊,
獻給你潔白的雙手,它們像葡萄一樣柔軟。


6. "I Remember You As You Were"

I remember you as you were in the last autumn.
You were the grey beret and the still heart.
In your eyes the flames of the twilight fought on.
And the leaves fell in the water of your soul.

Clasping my arms like a climbing plant
the leaves garnered your voice, that was slow and at peace.
Bonfire of awe in which my thirst was burning.
Sweet blue hyacinth twisted over my soul.

I feel your eyes travelling, and the autumn is far off:
grey beret, voice of a bird, heart like a house
towards which my deep longings migrated
and my kisses fell, happy as embers.

Sky from a ship. Field from the hills:
Your memory is made of light, of smoke, of a still pond!
Beyond your eyes, farther on, the evenings were blazing.
Dry autumn leaves revolved in your soul.

我記得你宛如去年秋天的模樣。
灰色的貝雷帽,平靜的心。
黃昏的火焰在你的眼中搏鬥。
在你靈魂的水面上落葉紛紛。

你像一條藤蔓將我的雙臂纏緊,
葉片在收集你緩慢、平靜的聲音。
我的渴望燃燒在驚愕的篝火裡。
藍色溫柔的風信子倒向我的靈魂。

我感到你的眼眸在漫遊,
而秋天多麼遙遠!
灰色的貝雷帽、鳥兒的啼鳴和家的心靈
我深深的渴望像那裡遷移。
我像火炭一樣的快樂的親吻也落在那裡。

從船上仰望天空。從山岡眺望田野。
你的記憶是光芒、煙霧、與平靜的池塘!
晚霞在你眼睛深處燃燒!
秋天的枯葉旋轉在你的靈魂上。


7. "Leaning into the Afternoons"

Leaning into the afternoons I cast my sad nets
towards your oceanic eyes.

There in the highest blaze my solitude lengthens and flames,
its arms turning like a drowning man's.

I send out red signals across your absent eyes
that move like the sea near a lighthouse.

You keep only darkness, my distant female,
from your regard sometimes the coast of dread emerges.

Leaning into the afternoons I fling my sad nets
to that sea that beats on your marine eyes.

The birds of night peck at the first stars
that flash like my soul when I love you.

The night gallops on its shadowy mare
shedding blue tassels over the land.


8. "White Bee"

White bee, you buzz in my soul, drunk with honey,
and your flight winds in slow spirals of smoke.

I am the one without hope, the word without echoes,
he who lost everything and he who had everything.

Last hawser, in you creaks my last longing.
In my barren land you are the final rose.

Ah you who are silent!

Let your deep eyes close. There the night flutters.
Ah your body, a frightened statue, naked.

You have deep eyes in which the night flails.
Cool arms of flowers and a lap of rose.

Your breasts seem like white snails.
A butterfly of shadow has come to sleep on your belly.

Ah you who are silent!

Here is the solitude from which you are absent.
It is raining. The sea wind is hunting stray gulls.

The water walks barefoot in the wet streets.
From that tree the leaves complain as though they were sick.

White bee, even when you are gone you buzz in my soul
You live again in time, slender and silent.

Ah you who are silent!


9. "Drunk with Pines"

Drunk with pines and long kisses,
like summer I steer the fast sail of the roses,
bent towards the death of the thin day,
stuck into my solid marine madness.

Pale and lashed to my ravenous water,
I cruise in the sour smell of the naked climate,
still dressed in grey and bitter sounds
and a sad crest of abandoned spray.

Hardened by passions, I go mounted on my one wave,
lunar, solar, burning and cold, all at once,
becalmed in the throat of the fortunate isles
that are white and sweet as cool hips.

In the moist night my garment of kisses trembles
charged to insanity with electric currents,
heroically divided into dreams
and intoxicating roses practicing on me.

Upstream, in the midst of the outer waves,
your parallel body yields to my arms
like a fish infinitely fastened to my soul,
quick and slow, in the energy under the sky.


10. "We Have Lost Even"

We have lost event this twilight.
No one saw us this evening hand in hand
while the blue night dropped on the world.

I have seen from my window
the fiesta of sunset int he distant mountaintops.

Sometimes a piece of sun
burned like a coin between my hands.

I remembered you with my soul clenched
in that sadness of mine that you know.

Where were you then?
Who else was there?
Saying what?
Why will the whole of love come on me suddenly
when I am sad and feel you are far away?

The book fell that is always turned to at twilight
and my cape rolled like a hurt dog at my feet.

Always, always you recede through the evenings
towards where the twilight goes erasing statues.


11. "Almost Out of the Sky"

Almost out of the sky, half of the moon
anchors between two mountains.
Turning, wandering night, the digger of eyes.
Let's see how many stars are smashed in the pool.

It makes a cross of mourning between my eyes, and runs away.
Forge of blue metals, nights of stilled combats,
my heart revolves like a crazy wheel.
Girl who have come from so far, been brought from so far,
sometimes your glance flashes out under the sky.
Rumbling, storm, cyclone of fury,
you cross above my heart without stopping.
Wind from the tombs carries off, wrecks, scatters your sleepy root.

The big trees on the other side of her, unprooted.
But you, cloudless girl, question of smoke, corn tassel.
You were what the wind was making with illuminated leaves.
Behind the nocturnal mountains, white lily of conflagration,
ah, I can say nothing! You were made of everything.

Longing that sliced my breast into pieces,
it is time to take another road, on which she does not smile.

Storm that buries the bells, muddy swirl of torments,
why touch her now, why make her sad.

Oh to follow the road that leads away from everything,
without anguish, death, winter waiting along it
with their eyes open through the dew.


12. "Your Breast is Enough"

Your breast is enough for my heart,
and my wings for your freedom.
What was sleeping above your soul will rise
out of my mouth to heaven.

In you is the illusion of each day.
You arrive like the dew to the cupped flowers.
You undermine the horizon with your absence.
Eternally in flight like the wave.

I have said that you sang in the wind
like the pines and like the masts.
Like them you are tall and taciturn,
and you are sad, all at once, like a voyage.

You gather things to you like an old road.
You are peopled with echoes and nostalgic voices.
I awoke and at times birds fled and migrated
that had been sleeping in your soul.


13. "I Have Gone Marking"

I have gone marking the atlas of your body
with crosses of fire.
My mouth went across: a spider, trying to hide.
In you, behind you, timid, driven by thirst.

Stories to tell you on the shore of evening,
sad and gentle doll, so that you should not be sad.
A swan, a tree, something far away and happy.
The season of grapes, the ripe and fruitful season.

I who lived in a harbor from which I loved you.
The solitude crossed with dream and with silence.
Penned up between the sea and sadness.
Soundless, delirious, between two motionless gondoliers.

Between the lips and the voice something goes dying.
Something with the wings of a bird, something of anguish and oblivion.
The way nets cannot hld water.
My toy doll, only a few drops are left trembling.
Even so, something sings in these fugitive words.
Something sings, something climbs to my ravenous mouth.
Oh to e able to celebrate you with all the words of joy.

Sing, burn, flee, like a belfry at the hands of a madman.
My sad tenderness, what comes over you all at once?
When I have reached the most awesome and the coldest summit
my heart closes like a nocturnal flower.


14. "Every Day You Play"

Every day you play with the light of the universe.
Subtle visitor, you arrive in the flower and the water.
You are more than this white head that I hold tightly
as a cluster of fruit, every day, between my hands.

You are like nobody since I love you.
Let me spread you out among yellow garlands.
Who writes your name in letters of smoke among the stars of the south?
Oh let me remember you as you were before you existed.

Suddenly the wind howls and bangs at my shut window.
The sky is a net crammed with shadowy fish.
Here all the winds let go sooner or later, all of them.
The rain takes off her clothes.

The birds go by, fleeing.
The wind. The wind.
I can contend only against the power of men.
The storm whirls dark leaves
and turns loose all the boats that were moored last night to the sky.

You are here. Oh, you do not run away.
You will answer me to the last cry.
Cling to me as though you were frightened.
Even so, at one time a strange shadow ran through your eyes.

Now, now too, little one, you bring me honeysuckle,
and even your breasts smell of it.
While the sad wind goes slaughtering butterflies
I love you, and my happiness bites the plum of your mouth.

How you must have suffered getting accustomed to me,
my savage, solitary soul, my name that sends them all running.
So many times we have seen the morning star burn, kissing our eyes,
and over our heads the gray light unwind in turning fans.

My words rained over you, stroking you.
A long time I have loved the sunned mother-of-pearl of your body.
I go so far as to think that you own the universe.
I will bring you happy flowers from the mountains, bluebells,
dark hazels, and rustic baskets of kisses.
I want
to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees.


15. "I Like For You to be Still"

I like for you to be still: it is as though you were absent,
and you hear me from far away and my voice does not touch you.
It seems as though your eyes had flown away
and it seems that a kiss had sealed your mouth.

As all things are filled with my soul
you emerge from the things, filled with my soul.
You are like my soul, a butterfly of dream,
and you are like the word Melancholy.

I like for you to be still, and you seem far away.
It sounds as though you were lamenting, a butterfly cooing like a dove.
And you hear me from far away, and my voice does not reach you:
Let me come to be still in your silence.

And let me talk to you with your silence
that is bright as a lamp, simple as a ring.
You are like the night, with its stillness and constellations.
Your silence is that of a star, as remote and candid.

I like for you to be still: it is as though you were absent,
distant and full of sorrow as though you had died.
One word then, one smile, is enough.
And I am happy, happy that it's not true.


16. "In My Sky at Twilight"

(This poem is a paraphrase of the 30th poem in Rabindranath Tagore's The Gardener.)

In my sky at twilight you are like a cloud
and your form and color are the way I love them.
You are mine, mine, woman with sweet lips
and in your life my infinite dreams live.

The lamp of my soul dyes your feet,
My sour wine is sweeter on your lips,
oh reaper of my evening song,
how solitary dreams believe you to be mine!

You are mine, mine, I go shouting it to the afternoon's
wind, and the wind hauls on my widowed voice.
Huntress of the depths of my eyes, you plunder
stills your nocturnal regard as though it were water.

You are taken in the net of my music, my love,
and my nets of music are wide as the sky.
My soul is born on the shore of your eyes of mourning.
In your eyes of mourning the land of dreams begins.


17. "Thinking, Tangling Shadows"

Thinking, tangling shadows in the deep solitude.
You are far away too, oh farther than anyone.
Thinking, freeing birds, dissolving images,
burying lamps.

Belfry of fogs, how far away, up there!
Stifling laments, milling shadowy hopes,
taciturn miller,
night falls on your face downward, far from the city.

Your presence is foreign, as strange to me as a thing.
I think, I explore great tracts of my life before you.
My life before anyone, my harsh life.
The shout facing the sea, among the rocks,
running free, mad, in the sea-spray.
The sad rage, the shout, the solitude of the sea.
Headlong, violent, stretched towards the sky.

You, woman, what were you there, what ray, what vane
of that immense fan? You were as far as you are now.
Fire in the forest! Burn in blue crosses.
Burn, burn, flame up, sparkle in trees of light.

It collapses, crackling. Fire. Fire.
And my soul dances, seared with curls of fire.
Who calls? What silence peopled with echoes?
Hour of nostalgia, hour of happiness, hour of solitude,
hour that is mine from among them all!

Hunting horn through which the wind passes singing.
Such a passion of weeping tied to my body.
Shaking of all the roots,
attack of all the waves!
My soul wandered, happy, sad, unending.

Thinking, burying lamps in the deep solitude.

Who are you, who are you?


18. "Here I Love You"

Here I love you.
In the dark pines the wind disentangles itself.
The moon glows like phosphorous on the vagrant waters.
Days, all one kind, go chasing each other.

The snow unfurls in dancing figures.
A silver gull slips down from the west.
Sometimes a sail. High, high stars.

Oh the black cross of a ship.
Alone.
Sometimes I get up early and even my soul is wet.
Far away the sea sounds and resounds.
This is a port.
Here I love you.

Here I love you and the horizon hides you in vain.
I love you still among these cold things.
Sometimes my kisses go on those heavy vessels
that cross the sea towards no arrival.
I see myself forgotten like those old anchors.
The piers sadden when the afternoon moors there.
My life grows tired, hungry to no purpose.
I love what I do not have. You are so far.
My loathing wrestles with the slow twilights.
But night comes and starts to sing to me.

The moon turns its clockwork dream.
The biggest stars look at me with your eyes.
And as I love you, the pines in the wind
want to sing your name with their leaves of wire.


19. "Girl Lithe and Tawny"

Girl lithe and tawny, the sun that forms
the fruits, that plumps the grains, that curls seaweeds
filled your body with joy, and your luminous eyes
and your mouth that has the smile of the water.

A black yearning sun is braided into the strands
of your black mane, when you stretch your arms.
You play with the sun as with a little brook
and it leaves two dark pools in your eyes.

Girl lithe and tawny, nothing draws me towards you.
Everything bears me farther away, as though you were noon.
You are the frenzied youth of the bee,
the drunkenness of the wave, the power of the wheat-ear.

My somber heart searches for you, nevertheless,
and I love your joyful body, your slender and flowing voice.
Dark butterfly, sweet and definitive
like the wheat-field and the sun, the poppy and the water.


20. "Tonight I can write"

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.

Write, for example, 'The night is starry
and the stars are blue and shiver in the distance.'

The night wind revolves in the sky and sings.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.

Through nights like this one I held her in my arms.
I kissed her again and again under the endless sky.

She loved me, sometimes I loved her too.
How could one not have loved her great still eyes.

Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
To think that I do not have her. To feel that I have lost her.

To hear the immense night, still more immense without her.
And the verse falls to the soul like dew to the pasture.

What does it matter that my love could not keep her.
The night is starry and she is not with me.

This is all. In the distance someone is singing. In the distance.
My soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

My sight tries to find her as though to bring her closer.
My heart looks for her, and she is not with me.

The same night whitening the same trees.
We, of that time, are no longer the same.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but how I loved her.
My voice tried to find the wind to touch her hearing.

Another's. She will be another's. As she was before my kisses.
Her voice, her bright body. Her infinite eyes.

I no longer love her, that's certain, but maybe I love her.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.

Because through nights like this one I held her in my arms
my soul is not satisfied that it has lost her.

Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her.


# "The Song of Despair"

The memory of you emerges from the night around me.
The river mingles its stubborn lament with the sea.

Deserted like the wharves at dawn.
It is the hour of departure, oh deserted one!

Cold flower heads are raining over my heart.
Oh pit of debris, fierce cave of the shipwrecked.

In you the wars and the flights accumulated.
From you the wings of the song birds rose.

You swallowed everything, like distance.
Like the sea, like time. In you everything sank!

It was the happy hour of assault and the kiss.
The hour of the spell that blazed like a lighthouse.

Pilot's dread, fury of a blind diver,
turbulent drunkenness of love, in you everything sank!

In the childhood of mist my soul, winged and wounded.
Lost discoverer, in you everything sank!

You girdled sorrow, you clung to desire,
sadness stunned you, in you everything sank!

I made the wall of shadow draw back,
beyond desire and act, I walked on.

Oh flesh, my own flesh, woman whom I loved and lost,
I summon you in the moist hour, I raise my song to you.

Like a jar you housed the infinite tenderness,
and the infinite oblivion shattered you like a jar.

There was the black solitude of the islands,
and there, woman of love, your arms took me in.

There were thirst and hunger, and you were the fruit.
There were grief and the ruins, and you were the miracle.

Ah woman, I do not know how you could contain me
in the earth of your soul, in the cross of your arms!

How terrible and brief was my desire of you!
How difficult and drunken, how tensed and avid.

Cemetery of kisses, there is still fire in your tombs,
still the fruited boughs burn, pecked at my birds.

Oh the bitten mouth, oh the kissed limbs,
oh the hungering teeth, oh the entwined bodies.

Oh the mad coupling of hope and force
in which we merged and despaired.

And the tenderness, light as water and as flour.
And the word scarcely begun on the lips.

This was my destiny and in it was the voyage of my longing,
and in it my longing fell, in you everything sank!

Oh pit of debris, everything fell into you,
what sorrow did you not express, in what sorrow are you not drowned!

From billow to billow you still called and sang.
Standing like a sailor in the prow of a vessel.

You still flowered in songs, you still broke in currents.
Oh pit of debris, open and bitter well.

Pale blind diver, luckless slinger,
lost discoverer, in you everything sank!

It is the hour of departure, the hard cold hour
which the night fastens to all the timetables.

The rustling belt of the sea girdles the shore.
Cold stars heave up, black birds migrate.

Deserted like the wharves at dawn.
Only the tremulous shadow twists in my hands.

Oh farther than everything. Oh farther than everything.

It is the hour of departure. Oh abandoned one!


--
reference

NPO idea




1. 電視新聞

今年因為氣候適合,以至於水果大豐收,卻反而造成供需不均,使果農慘賠。

2.
台灣農業面臨的問題一直都是天氣,天災則心血白費,天氣太好竟也讓供需問題造成損失。也就是說,必須要能夠有一個 switch,讓產量能夠調節,不管產多產少都能讓生產者有合理的收益。

3.
政府推動的農產品加工計畫為何不得而知,但這種事情如果讓民間來做一定更快,這種事情反而沒有 bot,很奇怪。以目前的新鮮水果冰淇淋為例,初步 google 的結果,是有個體戶藉此開店成功,但並沒有朝向更大的商業化規模,冰淇淋這種東西,低溫冷藏的話應該是很不容易壞吧?那至少可以把食用期從一週左右的水果,拉長到一年以上。賣這種東西當作台灣 NPO 的經費來源,既具本土化、也利於弱勢的農民、更為自己帶來利潤,三贏。

4.
其他的農產品也可以用相似的方法加以處理,以企業的模式,大量收購賤價而品相良好的的農產品以調整其價格,並加工轉化,造成更有競爭力的新產品。

5. 賣公平交易咖啡?遜、沒創意、抄襲、台灣又沒多少地方種咖啡。賣產地直銷的農產品,酷,一方面可能具有價格競爭力,另一方面還可以間接支持到有機農業等對於這塊土地有意義的事情,當然也可以獲取合理的利潤。


2009年7月11日 星期六

dance. 2009 雲門公演






節目單:

1.《流雲》
以馬勒「第五交響曲」入舞,從太極出發,輕柔飄逸,是十多年後,以太極導引動作為靈感的舞作《水月》的「母親」。

2.《行草》與3.《狂草》
以書法為靈感編作的「行草三部曲」的系列之作,是雲門舞者長年浸淫書法、武術的成果,也是林懷民的巔峰之作。

4.《水月》
由「鏡花水月畢竟總成空」汲取靈感的詩意之作,被譽為「二十世紀的經典」。

5.獨舞《輓歌》
舞者以長時間的原地旋轉,表達對逝者的悼念,對蒼天的抗議,撼人的張力,感動無數觀眾。

6.《花語》
使用巴哈音樂入舞,八萬片花瓣帶來繁美的感官震撼,是林懷民2008年最新力作。


我最喜歡的還是水月吧,很容易看到一些東西,懂不懂是另一回事。肢體表現很直接而豐富的獨舞,人的肢體成為另一種柔軟而流動的物件,在舞台上綻放、擴張、旋轉。狂草和行草也都很帥,只是或許已經看多了行草那種玩長袖的表現模式的梗,所以狂草的張力比較吸引我。林懷民好像比較喜歡讓男舞者飛離地面?

輓歌對跳的人必定是一大考驗,看得人都快頭暈了,裙子再這齣舞裡不可避免地成為最重要的元素,裙擺隨著旋轉的速度而上下起伏,裙腳被高高拉起、抱緊,而手臂則是另一個充滿張力的元素。

花語像是臨老入花叢的作品,色調、題材、手法都異常地輕快鮮艷,男舞者的屁股在一開始的時候扭很大。看起來像是以春天為時空背景的多線敘事大圓滿愛情輕喜劇。最後上台的某個伯伯大概才是最經典的吧。

流雲不是我的菜,太和緩,比較像是熱身操、收心操之類的。

舞蹈跟建築的共通點,大概都在於抵抗地心引力,跳得再高也都要落下。然而舞蹈的美就在於一個個動作變換的瞬間,肢體所呈現出的超乎人的屬性,走、跑、跳、揮舞、扭動、對位、快慢、高低、前後、爆發性,是稍縱即逝的。什麼動作都可被編入現代舞,抽象,藉由肢體呈現出某種曖昧的符碼,刺激觀者的情緒。

所以,輓歌為表達痛苦,讓舞者從頭旋轉到尾,加上掙扎的手勢、披頭散髮;花語粉嫩色系的各種視覺元素,以及男女舞者輕快跳動、互相聯繫的肢體,無疑在傳達愛情。


2009年7月7日 星期二

日劇 - 結婚できない男/不能結婚的男人





這是之前找跟建築師有關的影像資料時注意到的,整部片只是借用建築師這個職業,當作男主角龜毛孤僻個性的著力點,但所有的笑點都不怎麼建築師,跟個性比較有關,阿部寬演得非常的好,把一些某部份人或多或少都會有的怪癖放大,對照於相對正常而年輕的人們,以及敗犬級的同齡女士,那種讓人狂笑的地方不是志村式的刻意,心態上有一部分比較像是『萬一我哪天也這樣怎麼辦!?』,笑的是那種情境,大概也是要年過25才比較容易看懂。

總之,在劇情的營造、演員的表現上來說,是最近看過最好看的